To me, the greatness of climbing trips is based on a casserole of abstract criteria: rock quality, natural beauty, weather, food, cultural experiences, and climbing performance are all part of the equation, but the company absolutely carries the most weight, and I don’t think it’s ever been better than our Rocklands trip. If it had rained every single day, Me, Katie, David, Nicole, Ty, Beans, & Jeremy would have had almost as much fun hanging out in our cottages, talking in foreign accents, trading stories, drinking Stoney, and catching up on life. Fortunately, the weather was idyllic, and we got to do all of the above while trading burns on the world’s best boulders.
Flying into Cape Town
Unfortunately Jeremy and Nicole were delayed by a day, so the rest of us crammed crashpads, gear, and bodies into one of our two rental cars, left the other car for them at the airport, and drove North into the Cederberg Mountains. We arrived at our rental house, an old converted schoolhouse, well after dark. I woke up first, walked outside and was stunned to be surrounded by hillsides crammed full of orange and grey boulders, that had been invisible to us when we arrived.
View from the back of our house
Warming up with the crew at The Plateau; I distinctly remember everyone cheering when Jeremy dabbed on this V0 warmup.
Katie on ‘Bad Boy for Life’ (V0/1) at The Plateau
Beans flashing ‘Girl on our Mind’ (Hard V4) at The Plateau. A Rocklands classic but hard for V4, which would be a theme throughout the trip. I climbed V4s that were harder, and took me more tries, than some of the V7s that I sent in the same sector.
Warming up in our backyard, notice the mini pool
Beans on ‘Sex Etiquette’ V5 in Arch Valley
Arch Valley: The consensus most magical area in Rocklands, a 20 foot wide slot canyon of sandstone at perfect bouldering height, broken by a series of arches on one side. Highlights of the area include Beans’ improbable send of ‘Esoterrorist’ at night, Ty getting to the top of Mini El Cap (100 V-points) by doing the highball dyno ‘Down with Words’ at night, and David’s send of ‘Sex Etiquette,’ which was also arguably the best boulder of the trip.
Another one of Beans on ‘Sex Etiquette’ V5 in Arch Valley
Sex Etiquette starts on a slab that climbs into an alcove roof (you can see the start below and right of Beans in the photo above). You lean out into a huge jug hueco in the roof (where Beans’ right hand is) and then jump to the left hand crimp. Right heel hook, match the crimp, bump out left and then a burly toss to the victory jug in the notch. Happy times.
Starry Night at The Plateau
Beans cheating on Mowgli
This black lab adopted us during our stay in ZA. On this particular day, we wandered around the boulders all day and strangely never saw her. We came home that night to see her outside our backdoor, apparently she had been awaiting our arrival all day. Ty named her Zulu.
Jeremy looking cool on ‘Minki’ V8 at Far Plateau
Plate
Katie looking way too happy to be trying hard and tearing her skin up at the same time
That’s more like it
David pawing his way up ‘Tiger Claw’ a phenomenal highball V5. Nicole threw down on this boulder for a couple of days, and sent in inspiring fashion as her first V5 at the end of our trip.
David with the visionary flip-flop ascent of Cobra Thigh. There have been many instagram repeaters of this ascent, but we know who the real trailblazer is here.
Nicole getting HIGH on a “boulder” (i.e. a cliff) at The Pass. Pretty hardcore.
Teapot Boulder, at the Kliphuis Campground
KT on ‘Up the Spout’ (V3), This is rumored to be the first boulder put up in the Rocklands by Fred Nicole in 1804. Definitely hard at the grade.
Jeremy grasping at crimps on Baboon Sumo. When we first got to the Kliphuis Campground we were passing this boulder and Jeremy told me that it was V9. I didn’t think it looked too bad, so I grabbed some pads and ended up doing it in a few tries, super psyched to have sent my first V9. When we got back to the house I looked in the guidebook and turns out it’s V7, womp. 🔪🔪But still a really awesome boulder.
Jeremy on ‘Lord Greystoke’ (V7/8)
Jeremy’s hand after sending Greystoke. One of the uniquely fun parts of this Rocklands trip was a series of bouldering challenges (with scorecard) that we came up. One of them ‘Flapper Central’ involved sending five dyno boulders during the trip. Jeremy proved how appropriately named the challenge was, when he sent Greystoke for his number five and tore these two epic flappers on his right hand. He also said he was done for the day. . . he wasn’t.
Previously mentioned bouldering challenges (Papyrus font was used in jest)
KT and Nicole had their patience tested by the ‘Hitting the Cycle’ challenge. As soon as one of the dudes did a V7 and a V6 it was game-on, time to hit the cycle, which resulted in several late night sessions wandering around the boulders, hungry, exhausted and very psyched, looking for soft, skin-friendly V5s and projecting impossible V4s. Mention ‘hitting the cycle’ to KT and see what happens. . . or don’t.
Seriously, though, the challenges were fun, and we definitely got into the weeds debating the micro-rules of each challenge (e.g., for Mini El Cap it is permitted to repeat boulders in the quest for 100 V points, for Royal Flush the boulder must have at least three problems on it, etc.) #RealLifeRocklandsProblems
KT getting ready to quest up this beautiful boulder at Kliphuis Campground
So for my overall review I would just say, spend as much time as you can in Arch Valley, definitely go climb Springbok, just do it, drink lots of Stoney, eat that peri peri sauce, take preventative taping measures on easy boulders, stargaze at the Sassies, and warm-up those shoulders and elbows for all the dynamic moves you’re going to be doing in pursuit of Flapper Central, oh yeah and go do Springbok.
Cape Town
Cape Town
Bye Rocklands!